Lately I have put a lot of thought into how much I love worship music. For the last 9 years of my life, worship music has relatively consumed it. 

One of the best parts about being able to play in so many different church settings with many different worship leaders is that I can sit down at the end of a day, or a month, or a year, and just sort through what I have seen. For years I have asked myself questions like these: 

1. What is the purpose of worship music?

2. What makes worship music different from other music?

3. What does God want from me in worshipping him through music?

4. What works?

5. What doesn't work?

6. Am I allowed to ask what works and what doesn't work?

7. What causes a congregation to want to worship God during music?

8. Is there truly anything worship leaders can do differently to change people's desires?

9. Why is worship music in some churches or youth groups just plain awkward?

10. Are we called to simply have our own hearts prepared, or can we help others?

These are some of the things that have swirled through my mind driving home from playing drums at different church services, youth groups, worship nights, etc. Over the years I have played nights where I drove home speechless, having felt like it was the most incredible worship experience I have ever had. Other nights I would drive home speechless because I couldn't believe I didn't die of awkwardness before it was over. 

I don't really want to sort through every possible worship definition, theory, or solution. And I don't really want to try and break down numbers and seating arrangements and lighting and how many candles per table. But I do want to think dangerously practical. 

If there is one thing that I truly believe separates incredible worship of God from a simple good time, happy feelings, or complete awkwardness it is this: Be vulnerable. 

The ancient musical struggle of young vs. old in the church is probably never going to go away. The days of pipe organists and drummers sharing solos are most likely never coming. But whether your worship setting is fresh out of the womb, or just trying to make it to the next meal, I truly believe that authentic worship happens best through vulnerability. And the best part is that not only can it happen in our hearts, but it can also happen in our songs. 

Take for example what I would call the "Contemporary Christian Tune" (CCT...sure why not). Broken down and mapped out, the typical CCT would look something like this: 

Pretty simple. Standard form. The dotted line of "Intensity" simply refers to just that, volume, power, and therefore, emotion as well. 

Most contemporary churches (including my home church of Saddleback), don't veer very far off this roadmap. Maybe toss in a special music song here, or a reflection song there, and spice things up for Christmas and Easter. But in a typical weekend, songs will be emotionally straightforward, and about as controversial as chicken noodle soup. 

What is the other option? Well, put simply, it is to be vulnerable with our music. To allow our music to reflect the emotional battles of our week that we bring to God in worship. This style, like it or not, isn't going anywhere. And it looks something like this: 

This is what could be called modern worship. It is risky, emotional, and powerful. If these two graphs were roller coasters, you could bet which one might make you lose your lunch. 

So what is vulnerability in worship? And is it even biblical? Is it so wrong to have upbeat and cheerful singing in a church? Are you just one of those youth group kids that refuses to use major chords? Those are all questions worth sorting through. 

Vulnerability in worship is when we refuse to put our best foot forward. It's when we recognize the struggles of life, the peaks and valleys, our hurts and pains, our joys and victories, and express our love for God through, despite, and because of all of it. It is refusing to be Joe Christian who never has a bad day. It is when the congregation has more to think about then whether or not their claps are on beat, and what restaurant to eat at afterwards. Vulnerability in worship is authenticity expressed through the speakers, our lives expressed in our voices, and our hearts expressed in our posture. 

But worship isn't about us. It is about God, and God is always good. God is the same yesterday, today, and forever. And worship isn't about me, it is about who God is, and me recognizing that. So for us to sit around and talk about how my life and my struggles and my heart is supposed to effect God's gift from us is kind of immature. Right? But is that what we find when we look at the bible, through the psalms, through job, through Jesus in the desert?......